Give to Give

Sometimes it is worth it to tighten our budget a little bit more to be able to give a little bit more.
We know that in order to receive, we shall first learn how to give.
Instead of Give to Receive, perhaps we could Give to Give.
There are things that we should be prudent of and there are things that we should be generous towards.
Upon giving, somehow we felt gooood....
Be it Time, Money, Effort, Creativity & any form of Resources.
Try give some of it out to help someone and observe how do you feel afterwards.

Last Minute Appreciation

Yesterday was the last day of one of my colleague working in our company. All the staff basically had a great lunch in an Indonesian Restaurant... grilled chicken with vege plus iced lemon tea.
Of course that is not the point!
After all of our stomachs are filled, we shared on how each of us felt working with this lovely and capable lady. Finally all the good words are shared and all the compliments started pouring out from our hearts. Collectively, we mentioned that this lady is extremely patient in handling difficult tasks and great at multi-tasking, very kind-hearted and did all of her jobs with a great big smile!
I am pretty sure all of us will miss her presence.
On the other hand, I felt another sad part of this event.

How come most of the employees are only appreciated verbally only at the moment of farewell?
Why all of a sudden, heartfelt and touchy words were uttered during the last day of a person?

Is it we are too busy chasing KPI, figures and troubleshooting daily challenges?
Perhaps we are too focus on the maximum use of our time for a high-level of productivity?
Maybe it is a norm in our Asian culture of not being expressive?
Or we just simply forgot?

I think one of the way to really bring out the best in people is through sincere compliments, words of acknowledgement and appreciation. We use our mind for management and we use our heart for appreciation. Basically, we use both.

Why not begin with the culture of "A Compliment A Day, Puts All The Negative Away".

Chronological Events After Marriage

During courtship: Honey + Moon!
Right after marriage: HoneyMoon!
2nd year of marriage: Honey, where's the Moon?
3rd year of marriage: Honey without the Moon!
4th year of marriage: SugarMoon (travel locally). Sugar is cheaper than Honey ok!
5th year of marriage: No Honey, no Sugar and no Moon!
6th year of marriage: Tsunamis & Earthquakes! The Yin can't balance the Yang...
7th year of marriage: World War 3!
8th year of marriage: Independence Day...Merdeka! Then go separate ways....
9th year of marriage: Both in rehabilitation centre!
10th year of marriage: Signing MoU of a lifetime & celebrate 10th anniversary!

....and they live happily ever after....

Weakness = Strength

Last year, I've written "You From Jupiter, I From Neptune!", about different people with different personalities or thinking styles. Basically people are either a Task-Oriented, People-Oriented, Introvert or Extrovert person. I've found out in different circumstances, a person's Weakness can be the Strength and vice-versa.

Case 1: Be Positive or Negative? We might stay away from negative people but it is those people that will question the practicality and viability of a venture. That is why the term "Cautiously Positive" or "Realistically Positive" are a balance way to move forward, with caution.

Case 2: An Extrovert must be better than an Introvert? An Introvert, who is always being seen as having a non-active or passive personality? The cold, Yin person! Boring to meet them huh...
They might be "allergy" to social gatherings or public speakings but they are really good in processing data and really comes in handy when it comes to planning and organizing. And most of the times, an Introvert will only say the right thing at the right moment because they process thoughts before speaking it out.

Case 3: What about being Open-Minded or Narrow-Minded?
If we are open-minded, some might see us as a non-principled person. Because we are so OPEN and not really focus in life. But open-mindedness can be a source to prevent argument and to adapt to alternative solutions during a crisis.
On the other side, if we are narrow-minded, some may think we are too STIFF and not adaptable to the changes around situations. As Charles Darwin quoted, "It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change". But narrow-minded people might get things done as they are focus and doesn't deviate.
Perhaps in a marriage, we should be NARROW-MINDED and focus in one relationship.
But in a business, we should be OPEN-MINDED and be flexible to change.

Case 4: Is Perfection a must? We thought having a perfect command of English will be highly perceived as gentleman! Not really. I've watched a durian-seller, who is a millionaire, speaking broken English that can stir up a crowd and motivate them as opposed to another professional & eloquent speaker who speaks perfectly great, but extremely boring and I felt sleepy listening to him......

So, what's the conclusion?

Between Flexibility and Focus, which one is useful?
Between Negative Thinking and Positive Thinking, which one is better?
Between a Sociable and a Bookworm person, which one do you prefer?

I would say all of it are beneficial, if it is used in the right place.

Flexibility should be practised in business while Focus can be very useful when we want to lose weight!
Negative Thinking and suspicion can be used to uncover crime activities while Positive Thinking can be very uplifting and perhaps, a trait of a cheerleader!
Sociability might be able to improve contacts and networks while Introvert can be a great listener for people who needs a shoulder to cry on!

Therefore, I think a person doesn't really has Strengths or Weaknesses. It really depends on where and how someone use it for betterment or for worst. If having the Right People doing the Wrong Thing or the Wrong People doing the Right Thing, it will be the worst of it. Unless it is the Right People doing the Right Thing, it would be a perfect match!

Remember, before criticising others and magnifying people's weaknesses using the wrong lens, we may want to review "where" is the weaknesses being seen.

I should remind myself as well!!

Knowledge is a Liability

...only if we don't use it!

What is an Asset? It is something that generates & put money in.
What is a Liability? It is something that takes money out.

How do we gain knowledge?
We have to learn & "buy" from different sources. From books, learning tools, seminars, conferences or courses. Of course money is flowing out in this case. Therefore, unused-knowledge is a liability!
Which means, don't pursue any knowledge if we don't intend to apply it.

Why do we pursue knowledge then?
Because we believe "Knowledge is Power"......IT IS NOT! "Applied Knowledge is Power"!
Knowledge only gives us Potential Power. It can load us with preparation, proper mindset & different angles of looking at things.
But the Final Power lies in our ACTION!

So, let's pump ourselves up!!

Powerful Story is more influential than Logical Analysis

Recently, I've met 3 new friends through another friend. What a blessing to know all of em'.

One man in particular, in his 50's, doesn't has a super high education but went through The School of Hard-Knocks! Due to some crisis, he dropped from the status of million-aire to thousand-aire and eventually zero-aire!

He doesn't give up. He learn, explore & kept discovering different strategies to achieve his goal.
Then he bounced back from nothing to SOMETHING. And he taught his children the same principle.
Today, he is living a comfortable life and yet developed the necessary momentum to continue forward.

He thinks like a man of action and acts like a man of thoughts.
After knowing years & years of complications, he knew how to detangled it into few simple principles and he lived & prospered from it.

To summarise what I've observed,
1) We've got to have mentor or mentors in life.
2) Willing to learn & apply.
3) Renew our mind & change strategies till we've got it.
4) Then use the strategies continuingly to gain an empire of wealth!!
5) Share the knowledge & empower others to gain self-satisfaction.

What a blessed meeting....

Happiness: Synthetic or Organic?

I just watched a local tv programme entitled "Sejuta Impian" organized by a telecommunication company to grant funds for people who have dreams, passion and action plans to realized it.
I'm impressed and touched by those who presented their dreams to help, uplift and enrich other's life.
With the pace of urban living, sometimes we care less of whatever that doesn't contribute to the P&L statement.

The P&L doesn't just stand for Profit & Loss.
It stands for People & Love as well!

Whatever we do today, are we really happy about it?
Are we, in any way helps or uplifts anyone along the journey of success?
Are we gaining Synthetic Happiness or the real stuff?

People succumb to alcohol, cigarettes, "escape-type" vacations, divorce, job promotions, fast cars, diamond rings, luxury bags....etc to gain synthetic and short term happiness. Those are By-The-Way of success. Nothing wrong with it as long as we are not too obsessed until we miss the main stuff.
What really matters is getting the organic and long-lasting chapter of happiness. We can achieve it through:

1. A sense of gratitude
2. The process of accomplishing a worthwhile goal
3. Enriching and uplifting others

One of my way of getting happiness is through blogging. It serves as a channel of my thought expressions and I hope it enriches someone in some ways.
After writing blogs, I felt lighter, more satisfied and fulfilled.

And I hope you will find your way too....

Keeping the Main Thing

When we lose the Main Thing as the main thing, we have to keep the Main Thing, the main thing!
So that the main thing is to prioritize the Main Thing to be the main thing.

When the Main Thing is not the main thing anymore, it is hard to get the main thing again.
Then we will have other not-so Main Thing to be the main thing.

The main thing is ....."Don't lose the Main Thing coz it is the main thing"!!

Sense of Purpose

Over the years, upon reading some books, I'll write my Purpose or Mission statement.
Well, it might be a good way for me to review, change and grow accordingly.

Lately, I've just changed my Purpose Statement to a Purpose Question.
Short and simple. Easy to remember.
Personally, I feel a Question is more dynamic, provoking and stimulating than a Statement.

Example of a statement which sounds,
"To be the leader in the industry and achieving outstanding results of innovation & growth at all time."

Turn it to a question statement instead....
"How can we be the leader in the industry and to achieve outstanding results of innovation & growth at all time?"

Wouldn't it be better? Coz it sounds like provoking our thoughts all the time on how to achieve it better. And questions will help trigger us all the time to think forward.

In whatever we do, let's not forget to do Alignment & Balancing from time to time. Most importantly, "service" our mind regularly and don't wait until the stage of Overhauling of our brain nerves only to realized the importance of Renewal & Regeneration!!

Focus

Everyday, we tend to focus on many things surrounding us. Some matters while some are mere interruptions.
I've just talked to a friend lately while he was having some difficulties in his job. At that moment, the more he shared with me, the more negative he became. Because he was focusing in the bad stuff while sharing with me. The very first person that listens to it is himself! Again & again & again....

Repetitions will anchor the programming in our mind, either positive or negative, truths or lies, it will stick!

So how do we control or maintain our focus so as to keep the main thing, the main thing?
There are 3 factors;

1. The words that we speak.
2. The way that we speak.
3. The types of questions that we ask.

The words that we chose to communicate will affect how we see or perceive a situation. Words can lead our thoughts. Not the other way round.
I do succumb to negativity at times. But the moment I realized it, I switched station! From NM (Negative Modulation) to PM (Positive Modulation). The faster it is, the better its going to be. Perhaps practising it down to seconds or microseconds!

The way we speak will emotionalise it. And emotions can create a drive forward or a pull backward. Try saying the same sentence with different emotions, you'll get it.

How do we ask questions to ourself will determind our direction of focus. Ever heard someone says,
"Why is this happening to me?"
"Do I look like a loser?"
...instead of...
"How can I do better?"
"How can I win?"
"What can I do to move forward?"

Feel the difference?

Ok, let's practise to control our Focus and use it for the betterment of life.

By the way, I'm down with flu & a bit of soar throat while writing this. But I choose to focus on what I can do and what I want to do instead of dwelling in the sickness zone!