Simplify A Complicated Life

It is hard to complicate a complicated life but even harder to simplify a complicated life.
Because our mind is complicated while our heart is simple!
Sometimes we use our mind and sometimes we listen to our heart.

Therefore, sometimes we are complicated & sometimes we are simple.
Initially, we use our mind to think & analyse. Then complications arrived.
Until our mind is tired, then we turn to our heart.
Finally we say, "Why wanna complicate a simple life? Let's simplify a complicated life!"
After a big round, we can only see a simple life through our heart!! Eventually, we are looking for simple happiness.

Growth happens due to comparisons.
But unhappiness also comes from comparisons.
The difference is one is with positive comparisons while the latter is based on negative comparisons.

That is why in order to gain happiness, we often hear people saying, "Listen to your heart" instead of "Listen to your mind".
Therefore, it is easier to decide with our heart and execute it with our mind.

P/S: Hmm....seems like the heart has a big role in our life. I wonder where are the lungs & liver...!!

Deathbed

The other night, I've watched a tv show until midnight and it is called "Tuesdays With Morrie". It was an eye-opener and I believe this show will surely enlightens and awakens some people's purpose in life.

Morrie is a professor and an old man who fully live his life and lots of time, see the good in people and circumstances. He always gave wonderful wisdom of life to the students around him. Unfortunately, he was struck by a disease (I forgot what is it called...) and the virus is attacking his whole body from bottom up. But before he died, he met up with one of his students, a sport journalist, who was extremely dedicated to his work until he take life for granted and was in a dilemma on his life compass. After 19 years of not seeing each other, Morrie somehow help this man to look at life differently and to cherish what really matters instead of speeding through the journey all the time!

The whole show talked about how to live a life that we truly wanted and bless the people around us. Very often, we are after glamorous careers, great ambitions, make more money, get a big house and if possible, drive a Ferrari! But Morrie talked about how often that we stop and look at what we are after and says, "Wait a minute, is that what I really want in the first place?"

To make it more interesting, Morrie organized a "living funeral" for himself! What a great idea that breakthrough conventional pattern of dying! Yes, it is more meaningful to see our friends and family before we have our last breath and listen to what they have to say about us just before we die. What's the point of letting people compliment and praise you and you are not around to enjoy it.

I wish there are more tv shows that add values to us instead of negative dramas for whole year long.

Luckily, these are some of Morrie's quotes that I managed to jot it down while watching this show;

1. Never make money by using people.
2. Love always win.
3. Love is the only rational act, just let it come in.
4. We must love one another or die.
5. When we learn to die, we learn to live.
6. Forgive everybody everything.
7. Death ends life but not relationship.

Hope some of these quotes do give you a second thought and help you to discover your life compass.

Imagine that you are dying soon (well, everybody dies....it is not a touch-wood thing!), what do you really want to do and who do you want to be on your bedside during your last breath?

Our Inner Ear - Subconscious

Psychologists talk about expressing our problems and stress out. Some people channel it out through yelling, doing exercise, going through some form of therapies or sharing it with friends. Most commonly, we'll choose to share it with a buddy or someone older than us, perhaps lending us a pair of listening ear or some advice.

But I've tried before sharing some burden or stress with friends and the more I shared, the more negative I became! Because when we share, we are the first person to listen to it through our inner ear again & again until it is impregnated into our subconscious. As opposed to what psychologists talk about, the more I think about it and speak about it, the more I magnify the situations. The worst thing is the negative wind is now blowing to our friend who listen to us. Suppose he or she is having a great time and suddenly being striked by "Down-Syndrome" because of us, sharing unnecessary gossips or  negative stuff!

In conclusion, what shall we do? To share or not to share?
To share, we might experience a short sense of relief.
Not to share, we might explode one day!

In my opinion, we should talk it out and share it with 2 conditions;

1. Share with someone positive that we can trust.
2. Share with the mindset of solving it.

The first condition is to enable us to have a sense of relief and acknowledgement of someone knowing what we have gone through. The second condition is to help us to block the on-going flow of negative "chi" to ourself and to others. Eventually, if we let the negative air floats around, it will be cancerous! Until the extreme of someone committing suicide or doing something extreme and harmful without any conscious effort of curing it.

Life is only once.
Let's try our very best to minimize mental pollutions and contaminants in order to live with abundance.

Friendship

Awhile ago, a colleague of mine gave me a free coupon to redeem a frappucino in Starbucks. 2 hours later, I've redeemed it!! Ordered a Java Chip with a simple donut ...... here I am, feel like writing a message on friendship.

Eventhough it is a small token but I think it really made a pleasurable and relaxing evening for me. Especially after a hectic day running around, we just need some private moments and enjoy every bit of it. Sometimes we don't need expensive stuff, just something useful will turn our evening around.

Besides family, spouse or lovers, we need friends to be around us. Coz no man is an island.....
At times, they could lend a listening ear or even give some valuable insights that our stressful mind couldn't figure out. Sincere and enriching friendships are valuable. They may come in handy especially when we need someone to chit-chat, share our joy or lift off some of our burden.

They are friends that can hurt us. And some will help us. Of course there are some who make no difference in our lives. The quality of friendship that we spend time building on, will determine our altitude in life. If we spend most of our lives with someone who can help and uplift us, I'm sure we  live a more fulfilled life.

I just spoke to another 2 business friends this afternoon and we had a fruitful chat where I learn the word of commitment and focus from them. To me, both of them are successful as they love to help and add values to people's lives. Nothing is more fulfilling than to enrich someone to reach a level that they never thought of reaching.

Well, when you have time, what are you waiting for....just call a friend and chit-chat over a cup of coffee!!

4 Shapes of Life

Previously, I've written "You From Jupiter, I From Neptune" categorizing people's thinking pattern and of course the whole idea is for us to embrace and 'click' with each other instead of magnifying our differences. This message is to further elaborate another angle of viewing people's style and personalities.

Referring to the diagram;

1. Fluidic Externally, Solid Internally - It represent a person's friendliness externally and live by the principles internally. This is of course the best model we ought to have. In terms of communication, it is being handled tactfully and decisions are made based on self-belief and values.
2. Fluidic Externally, Fluidic Internally - This person is a bit of a 'Yes' man on the outside and inside. Extremely friendly and extremely fickle-minded as well.
3. Solid Externally, Solid Internally - Obviously, this person lives an edgy-life! He or She lives by the principles internally but having a hard time communicating and creating long-lasting relationship as they have a hard time blending with others with a different belief systems.
4. Solid Externally, Fluidic Internally - The is the worst of the worst where this person has no solid principles to live by and yet drawing a line between himself or herself with the external world. Eventually, they will be 'quarantined' by others as weirdos!

The 1st shape reminds me of the ancient gold coins used by the Chinese back in the old days. Perhaps at that time, Chinese are mostly live by principles and communicate tactfully. I am not sure, just a plain guess. I hope that blood still flows in the modern Chinese today.

I hope you are not falling into the 4th category!

The whole idea is to be aware of who we are and sharpen our so called 'rounded' principles and soften our 'edgy' way of communicating.

Admire vs. Envy

Let us learn to enjoy the beauty of admiring what we don't have that we can find in others. Jealousy will make us miserable. Envy will lead us to frustrations. Try to improve and strengthen our natural assets and what we are good at rather than comparing our weaknesses with other's strengths. The purpose is not to widen our gap with others but to find commonalities for accomplishments.

Some are born tall - they are naturally good for modeling!
Some are born short - don't worry, when the lightning strikes, the tall guy got it first!
Some are good in striking conversation - a magnet to a party!
Some are good in building long term friendship - loyalty comes in!
Some are naturally beautiful - but without brains.....oops!
Some are uggggggly - but with rationality and intelligence!

Well, I'm just having fun putting up some labels. But it is all about appreciating and admiring our own self.

Like yourself and Love who you are!
YOU ARE SPECIAL......

Life Labels

How do we live our life depends very much on the labels given by our ownself.
External labelling by peers, families, spouse & colleagues do affect our internal labelling if we are not strong enough.

Here are some thoughts about how some people viewed & labelled life...

LIFE IS ....
1) Hard - definitely this labelling is affecting one's mindset to continuously "struggle" in life.
2) A Game - this is a good one! When we lose a game, we can always re-start another game, discover new strategies & go through new levels. It is not Game Over yet.
3) About Winning or Losing - this is to remind us to be competitive and result oriented. But be careful not to practise it to the extreme of exploiting others to get what we want.
4) A Gift - this label is going to remind us to live with Gratitude, by focusing on what we have and be thankful.
5) A Discovery - this an Explorer's label; treating every situation and moment as an education and full of "mysteries"!
6) A Challenge - it is all about taking risk, being adventurous, keep going forward and not looking back.
7) A Journey - this is to understand life has its season; the ups & downs. Timing is everything. We are not going to reach and stop but keep moving.
8) A Dream - this is a good one, to remind us to Imagine and Visualize! Our daily job requires most of our Left-Brain hemisphere. It is good to exercise the Right hemisphere from time to time.
9) About Love - sacrifice, commitment and give; these are the 3 words that attached with this label. This is a reminder of money is not the only thing in life but families and friends are.
10) About Freedom - it is a good label to drive us to do what we want and what we passionate about.

Well, at different levels of life, we tend to "install" different labels to drive us forward or to bounce back from low-points or to remind us on life appreciation.
Keep this note, it might be useful along your journey of life.....

Enjoy Life...

Exploring life is a process of discovering Faith, Adventure, Direction & OwnSelf. Sometimes I'll know it when I start. I truly respect those who are experiencing a life of what is exactly being dreamt of years ago. When I watched one of Oprah's show where she helped a young girl achieving her dream of being a singer, getting an album done & singing with Celine Dion live, what a contribution! That's life! That is exciting. Making a difference in someone's life.

Time flies.
When I look back, only to realize not everything I have achieved is in concurrent with what I've planned or desired exactly.

Surprises & disappointments are around us. Indecisiveness are very frustrating and normally it is rooted from the lack of a compass!

I gotta align & focus!
But I won't just focus on the result while ignoring the process of enjoying some events and good people around me.

Money is important but after money, friends, family, respect & happiness is what we are after.

"Aiyah, why so Serious...... sometimes "sot-sot" like dat oso quite healthy!"

What Else Do We Need?

 

Some people live on FAITH.
Some people live on FATE.
But I think most people are hungry for a sense of CERTAINTY in whatever we do.
Be it Compliment or Criticism, we are looking for a certain level of Acknowledgement in life.

Well, I think if we could "microscopically" feel gratitude about those minor good things in life, we can surf the wave of life in an enjoyable manner.

Sometimes by Standing Still, we can review what is above us, below us, behind us and ahead of us.

Let's Live Life....

Change or Regret

5 minutes ago, I've just thought about....

"If we can re-live our life with our current mindset, what are we going to change in the first place?"
....our job?
....our education level?
....our friends?
....our attitude?
....our personality?
....perhaps taking more risks?
....perhaps doing business instead of working a job or vice-versa?
....perhaps pursuing something that we want-to, not something that we have-to?
....perhaps knowing Uncle Lim earlier!
....perhaps buying "that" particular Stock in KLSE that have risen few hundred percent!
....perhaps appreciating more on what we have?
....perhaps striving more on what we don't have?
....perhaps being more dynamic?
....perhaps spending more time with friends & families?
....etc....

So many "perhaps"! For some people, it will be endless.
But some are quite contented & learn to accept what have already "poured" on them.
But it is not too late. We still have time to CHANGE or CREATE things that we wanted.
Or else, the lists above would be longer as time goes by.

Let's cherish the "NOW" moment & do what we want to do!